As the days go by, we pause to reflect on how far we have come as a nation, how far we have come in building inclusive communities. But with each passing day, it becomes clear that gender equality still feels like a distant hope.
This is a generation that talks loudly and listens less. Everything is amplified, every opinion turns into a headline, and in that noise, real stories are drowned out. I have come to a personal decision not out of sentiment or obligation but out of truth and evidence. I have chosen to speak up for women, to stand with women, and to continue advocating for fairness.
I know this is not always comfortable. I have been asked, “Why bother?” Some say women are beginning to overstep their boundaries. That they are too loud, too emotional, too demanding. But one person’s experience does not speak for all. As Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie reminds us in The Danger of a Single Story, “The problem with stereotypes is not that they are untrue, but that they are incomplete. They make one story become the only story.” And this is exactly where we miss the point.
When data tells the truth
I have spent years collecting, analysing, and interpreting data. What I have seen is a systemic gap, one that runs through how we collect information, what we prioritise, and what we choose to see. I have seen women take the back seat during interviews, their voices overshadowed or silenced. I have been to a community in Adamawa state where women are not allowed to own land, not even through inheritance. I have witnessed these firsthand. The truth is, what we do not measure, we cannot manage. And if we are not tracking how women are faring across sectors, we should not be surprised when their realities are overlooked and their needs dismissed.
Let us consider the Nigerian agricultural sector. Women make up over 70% of the agricultural workforce in Nigeria1. They dominate smallholder farming, food processing, and market sales. But how many women have access to land, extension services, and modern tools? Only 10 percent, according to the Ministry of women affairs2. While men own the land, women do the work. While men attend the policy meetings, women feed the nation. This is not a story of weakness; it is a story of neglect. It is a story of what happens when institutions turn a blind eye to structural inequality.
The silence we normalise
We also need to pay attention to the stories that are silenced. Take the example of Senator Natasha Akpoti-Uduaghan, who stood tall to contest, win, and serve. When she spoke up about being sexually harassed, the issue was not her pain. The issue, for many, became her choice of words. What followed was not national outrage, but technical debates. People fixated on technicalities, grammar and interpretation, instead of facing the ugly reality that a woman had summoned the courage to speak about what many suffer in silence.
This is the Nigerian reality. A society where a woman who raises her voice is quickly reminded of “her place”. Where girls in schools are taught to keep quiet about abuse. Where survivors are asked, “What cloth did you put on?” instead of, “How can we protect you?”
It goes beyond politics or policy. It is in the marketplace, where women traders are routinely harassed by local authorities, buyers and ‘area boys’. It is in our homes, where some daughters are forced to abandon ambition for marriage. It is in our places of worship, where women are celebrated for submission, but rarely empowered for leadership.
Leadership plays a role in either reinforcing or dismantling this status quo. Governments that have adopted inclusive policies, even at the local government level, have recorded gains; from improved maternal health to better community engagement. Those that continue to see women’s inclusion as optional only prolong the cycle of inequality.
Why it is worth it
And when people say, “Women also do bad things,” I do not disagree. But men do too. This is not about perfection. It is about access, equal opportunity, about dignity. Everyone deserves the chance to rise, to lead, to contribute, without facing additional barriers because of their gender.
I know it is exhausting. Fighting for what is right often is a struggle. Sometimes, I ask myself the hard question: Is it really worth it? Is it worth challenging people who think the system is fine as it is? The answer is yes.
It is worth it because we cannot keep repeating old patterns and expecting new results. It is worth it because women and girls in every community deserve more than survival. They deserve freedom. They deserve a voice. They deserve justice.
This is not about taking power from men. It is about building a society where power is not reserved for one gender. Where our daughters can grow without apology. Where our sons can learn empathy, not dominance.
This is why I will keep speaking, standing, and pushing. Because one voice may not change the world in a day. But one voice can inspire another. And before long, we will be many.
References
George, G. (2023, May 27). Only 10% of landowners in Nigeria are women – FG. Punch Newspapers. https://punchng.com/only-10-of-landowners-in-nigeria-are-women-fg/
Samuel, E. (2024, November 20). Capacity-building efforts enhance Nigerian female farmers’ productivity and income. IITA Blogs. https://blogs.iita.org/index.php/capacity-building-efforts-enhance-nigerian-female-farmers-productivity-and-income/
About the Author
Gbemi is currently the Monitoring, Evaluation and Learning Lead at WILAN. He is a seasoned Monitoring and Evaluation (M&E) Consultant with over a decade of experience delivering evaluation services for donor-funded development projects.
He has provided M&E support to the Foreign, Commonwealth and Development Office (FCDO UK) on a gender equality-themed project implemented across two tertiary institutions in Lagos, contributing to evidence-based decision-making and learning. Gbemi also served on the project team for the Nigeria Bottling Company’s Lady Mechanic Initiative, which successfully challenged gender stereotypes by demonstrating that women and girls can thrive in non-traditional professions.
A highly skilled researcher, Gbemi has led and supported numerous studies and evaluations in the areas of women’s leadership, youth development, health and inclusive agricultural systems in Nigeria, West and East Africa.